Where is my mojo?!

Life goes in phases, sometimes things are hunky dory, you feel great, the stars are aligning and in your head you are a superhero capable of taking on the world.  These times are great and we should relish and enjoy them!  Other times though stuff just doesn’t feel quite right… Everything is just a bit more difficult, motivation levels are low, life feels HARD. I am going through a bit of a sluggish and hard phase at the moment and am hoping that writing about it will go towards turning things around and heading towards that superhero feeling once more.

In my mind, there are three important things that I need to focus on; 1. keeping good blood sugars, 2. eating healthily and 3. getting a regular dose of exercise.  Ultimately, these all contribute to making me the best person I can be, if I can stay on top of these three small (am I kidding – more like mahoosive!) things then I feel fab.  These last few weeks, however, all three have seemed like much harder challenges than usual and I have definitely fallen off more than one ‘wagon.’

Working as an Event Manager in a 5 star hotel, I have constant access to a veritable feast of ridiculously tasty and indulgent food and drink.  That, combined with the standard office treats and the seemingly endless birthdays we seem to have to celebrate with cake, mean that my willpower has had to become pretty strong over the years. I also conduct menu tastings on a weekly basis with potential clients where we are also encouraged to taste the food.  From day 1 though I made a rule that I do not taste myself, usually telling the client that I just had a big lunch 😉


Look at all that scrumptious fooooood!!!

Anyway, I digress…. recently, I have found my willpower on the food front has been waning, I don’t know if it is due to boredom (August is inevitably a bit queter in the office) or working some slightly more crazy hours and letting myself get too hungy.  I have basically had 4 or 5 occasions within the last month or so where I have literally thrown caution to the wind and indulged in all the tasty offerings available.  This obviously has consequences on a number of levels; I have do to A LOT of insulin to match the carbs and sugar consumed, I have to set alarms to test throughout the night as I am still completely clueless when it comes to absorbtion rates, it makes me feel pretty rubbish both physically and mentally, I feel like I have failed as a diabetic and as a person and then of course there is the glaringly obvious consequence of the wider health consequences of stuffing your face with carb and refined sugar heavy treats!!  You would expect all of these things would make me avoid this happening on a regular basis and usually, they absolutely would however, recently I just seem to have lost the ability to connect these consequences with what I am actually doing and I CAN’T STOP MYSELF!!  Maybe having written it down will actually re-start my brain in to realising that I need to GET A GRIP!

A direct result of the aforementioned ‘eating with gay abandon’ is of course some pretty unideal blood sugars which in turn have made me feel pretty rubbish.  Maybe this has then also contributed to my complete lack of motivation when it comes to exercise and inability to get out of bed and get moving in the mornings.  My usual routine before this little blip has always been:

MONDAY: Swim before work

TUESDAY: Pilates before work

WEDNESDAY: Swim before work and HIIT class after work

THURSDAY: Run to work and spinning after work

FRIDAY: Swim before work

WEEKENDS: all a bit dependant on what I am up to but usually include a spinning class and some sort of yoga or pilates

The above is combined with always exceeding my 10,000 steps per day (even if that means a quick jog around the common at 11pm!)

This last two weeks I have not got up once to exercise before work and have only managed 2/3 workouts throughout the week after work.  It’s a vicious circle as this has also obviously had a negative effect on blood sugars which in turn makes me feel rubbish and less likely to want to exercise!


The Vicious Circle!

Anyway – sorry for the loooong and negative post, hopefully next post I will be back on track and telling you all the healthy food and fun workouts I have been eating/doing!

Give me a shout if you have any strategies for getting back on track after an inevitable blip!


One thought on “Where is my mojo?!

  1. Oh man, I can write books on losing motivation and how hard it is to get back in the swing of things!

    I’ve been seeing a therapist for about 2 years now and one thing that is a recurring theme is to ‘just do it’. Easier said than done, holy crap, but once you get there you blow yourself away. The hardest part of getting back in your routine is the first step.

    Subconsciously, we use excuses to build the speed bump bigger and higher. There’s a long stretch of free highway past this speed bump, but every time we give in to excuses, the speed bump looks more and more like something we can’t get across. Then eventually we just admit defeat, ‘the speedbump is way too big, what’s the point?’.

    You know what the kicker is? The speedbump never changed, we just tell ourselves it did. Because the moment we let go of all the excuses, we barely even notice there is a speedbump to begin with.

    So regarding your exercise, I think sometimes we shouldn’t ‘look for motivation’ because that will just hold us back. We just have to get up and do it without thinking much about it at all.

    Liked by 1 person

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